so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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