We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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