Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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