Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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