Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.