Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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