So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
