she was so not down for the gang bang
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
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