im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
