I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize