You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
He called his prostate his "boner button".
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
