how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
