Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
