6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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