white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize