You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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