I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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