you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Green mimosas i think yes
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
