found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Send help, water and tortillas.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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