You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
