juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
