Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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