Michael Bay diarrhea
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
