We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
