i think my mom watched the whole time
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
