Me too!
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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