I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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