trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Dick very happy bro
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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