She's JV to your varsity
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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