You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
