does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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