Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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