Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
