he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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