remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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