not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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