were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
