Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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