i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
