Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
