Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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