Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
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