3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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