Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Randomize
