you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
