dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Someone came in the potted fern
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
