I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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