He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
The ass gains better be worth it
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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