Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize