Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
