Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls. http://tfl.nu/r53n
  Replies (3) Good night (768) Bad night (1319)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth. http://tfl.nu/la0a
  Replies (9) Good night (3028) Bad night (660)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed http://tfl.nu/sznd
  Replies (127) Good night (129799) Bad night (3523)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf? http://tfl.nu/a0bl
  Replies (16) Good night (913) Bad night (3736)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign? http://tfl.nu/nghc
  Replies (20) Good night (5249) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is. http://tfl.nu/pdzt
  Replies (10) Good night (3478) Bad night (1402)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears. http://tfl.nu/acnv
  Replies (41) Good night (13057) Bad night (1626)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (806): You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito. http://tfl.nu/i4sd
  Replies (19) Good night (6675) Bad night (1147)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar. http://tfl.nu/6ko7
  Replies (2) Good night (1665) Bad night (1009)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (806): Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight? http://tfl.nu/jadi
  Replies (6) Good night (3213) Bad night (925)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it http://tfl.nu/4p1k
  Replies (4) Good night (2215) Bad night (602)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way http://tfl.nu/eve3
  Replies (9) Good night (2611) Bad night (1126)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos. http://tfl.nu/1tew
  Replies (3) Good night (1096) Bad night (587)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work. http://tfl.nu/lc9m
  Replies (12) Good night (1047) Bad night (693)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year http://tfl.nu/k2mz
  Replies (3) Good night (631) Bad night (274)

Randomize