so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
someone owes me an orgasm
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
